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Sunday, February 19, 2012

Whispers











Dark voices
Whispers
Fighting to control
What little stability
I have left today
Listen
They say
Shhh
Trust us
We know how to fix this
Just do what we tell you
And it will all go away
Get in the car
Buy the ones you know
Will work
Lay out the accouterments
Be quiet
Lock the door
Shhh
No
I say aloud
That is not an option
Anymore
It won't work
It never did
I just didn't know any other way
To SHUT YOU UP
Shhh
Du calme
No one will know
Lies
I will know
So I refuse
And the whispers retreat
For now
Tomorrow is tomorrow
Still
And I know the whispers
Will return

© Erin Nanasi 2012

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Faking Breaking News











Every few days, I post a fake Breaking News update on my Facebook page. It’s usually extremely sarcastic; I’ve posted fake weather bulletins about a Santorum Surge and Calista Gingrich‘s weird bug eyes. Mad Mike had a brief obsession this morning with Ann Coulter, and I created a Breaking News post around Ms. (Mr.?) Coulter which read:

Breaking News: Ancient Roman Tomb Discovered In Ann Coulter’s Vagina, Archeologists Proud But In Desperate Need Of A Hug And Therapy.

The comments from friends are funnier than the post, which is why I am sharing them with you. I have some of the wittiest people on Earth as friends, and they chimed in with great enthusiasm.

Ken: They made it to the depths of hell and lived to talk about it!

Michael: It’s a movie called “THE DEEP”…lots of icky things down there with numerous bacteria!

Ken: Maybe they can make a movie, I want to see the scene where the archeologists go through the Pubic Jungle of Giant Crabs.

Me: Ken, rumor has it Mothra lives behind her left ovary.

Jesper: Ann Coulter has a vagina? I always thought she was post-op!

Gasp, aren't we terrible? Well, ya know what? Given the giant piles of crap we're been dealing with for the past few days-racist comments posted under Fox's article on Whitney Houston's death, Liz Trotta saying women should expect to be raped in the military, the war against contraception and anything Santorum-can you blame us? We're all punch drunk! And if making fun of Man Coultergeist (I didn't create that nickname, but I love it like it was my own child) gives us a giggle or two, who cares?

It's either this or kicking people in the head. And THAT'S still illegal. Flaming poo doorbell ditching is not illegal, though. Okay, who's got addresses for Ann Coulter, Liz Trotter, Rush Limbaugh and Bryan Fischer? Road trip!

© Erin Nanasi 2012

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Karen Handel Resigns, Effective Immediately











Karen Handel, the former GOP candidate for governor, just announced her resignation as a senior vice president for public of Susan G. Komen for the Cure – one week after the breast cancer charity reversed itself on a decision to sever financial ties with Planned Parenthood. Here’s the letter:

February 7, 2012

The Honorable Nancy Brinker

CEO, Susan G. Komen for the Cure VIA EMAIL

5005 LBJ Freeway, Suite 250

Dallas, Texas 75244

Dear Ambassador Brinker:

Susan G. Komen for the Cure has been the recognized leader for more 30 years in the fight against breast cancer here in the US – and increasingly around the world.

As you know, I have always kept Komen’s mission and the women we serve as my highest priority – as they have been for the entire organization, the Komen Affiliates, our many supporters and donors, and the entire community of breast cancer survivors. I have carried out my responsibilities faithfully and in line with the Board’s objectives and the direction provided by you and Liz.

We can all agree that this is a challenging and deeply unsettling situation for all involved in the fight against breast cancer. However, Komen’s decision to change its granting strategy and exit the controversy surrounding Planned Parenthood and its grants was fully vetted by every appropriate level within the organization. At the November Board meeting, the Board received a detailed review of the new model and related criteria. As you will recall, the Board specifically discussed various issues, including the need to protect our mission by ensuring we were not distracted or negatively affected by any other organization’s real or perceived challenges. No objections were made to moving forward.

I am deeply disappointed by the gross mischaracterizations of the strategy, its rationale, and my involvement in it. I openly acknowledge my role in the matter and continue to believe our decision was the best one for Komen’s future and the women we serve. However, the decision to update our granting model was made before I joined Komen, and the controversy related to Planned Parenthood has long been a concern to the organization. Neither the decision nor the changes themselves were based on anyone’s political beliefs or ideology. Rather, both were based on Komen’s mission and how to better serve women, as well as a realization of the need to distance Komen from controversy. I believe that Komen, like any other nonprofit organization, has the right and the responsibility to set criteria and highest standards for how and to whom it grants.

What was a thoughtful and thoroughly reviewed decision – one that would have indeed enabled Komen to deliver even greater community impact – has unfortunately been turned into something about politics. This is entirely untrue. This development should sadden us all greatly.

Just as Komen’s best interests and the fight against breast cancer have always been foremost in every aspect of my work, so too are these my priorities in coming to the decision to resign effective immediately. While I appreciate your raising a possible severance package, I respectfully decline. It is my most sincere hope that Komen is allowed to now refocus its attention and energies on its mission.

Posted from Political Insider with Jim Galloway.

I hope this is true. I hope that Ms. Handel, while blaming everyone else, eventually realizes that her rabid anti-choice politics have no place in women's health.

© Erin Nanasi 2012

Monday, February 6, 2012

The Wait Is Over!











Last year, The Onion, or as I call it, my Bible, posted an absolutely hysterical article on Planned Parenthood’s $800 million abortionplex. This new mega complex would have a shopping mall, a movie theater and a three story nightclub. The Onion featured interviews, including one with Marcy Kolrath, who was on the fence at first, but after a few margaritas and a “ride down the lazy river they’ve got circling the place” changed her mind and wished she could have aborted twins so she could stay a little longer. The sign that hangs in the middle of the abortionplex reads “No Life is Sacred.”

As often happens with satire, many people took this seriously. Especially people on the right. But, up till now, not one right wing politician publicly stated that he or she thought Planned Parenthood was actually building an $800 million abortionplex. Congressman John Fleming (R-LA) changed all that.

For those of you thinking, “Erin, his name rings a bell”, you’re right! This is the same John Fleming who bemoaned his measly $400,000 a year salary, and every liberal writer on the planet wrote “Gosh, how ever does that poor bastard feed his children?” Since that error in math wasn’t enough, Rep. Fleming chose to post a link to the abortionplex article on his Facebook page, nine months after the original ran, with the following comment:

More on Planned Parenthood, abortion by the wholesale.

The two comments that made it into the thread before it was ripped down were both incredulous as to how Fleming could not realize this was satire. Luckily for us, Literally Unbelievable was able to get a screen shot of the post and that screen shot went viral. What’s truly amusing is that last night, Julie Driscoll and I discussed this VERY Onion article on The Mad Women of Politics Anonymous, an Internet radio program. We mused how we were surprised more RWNJ had not taken it seriously. And then, Sky Cat answered our prayers.

I have been punked twice by satirical posts, both about Rick Perry. The problem was that the fictional comments were so close to actual Perry quotes that I fell for it. THIS? This is so ridiculous that it couldn’t possibly be true! An abortionplex? With a river ride and a nightclub? What the hell!

John Fleming, if he has any brains (which is questionable at best), is hiding under his bed, eating Twinkies and trying to figure out how to save his career. Since Mr. Fleming compared himself to the 99% last year during his “I only make $400,000 a year” whine fest, this gargantuan screw-up may solidify him as one of the dumbest human beings on Earth.

Mr. Fleming, I have a way you can get out of this, and make a name for yourself in the annals of history. ANNALS you homophobe, not anals. Jesus. Try for a Darwin Award. No, really. Maybe use a shotgun shell to complete the circuit for the headlights in your truck, or strap an Army rocket on top of your car, trigger it and blow through a mountain. Bungee jump off a 20 foot bridge with 30 feet of cord. Run with the bulls, wearing a read jumpsuit. Eat mercury. Use your obvious lack of intellect and common sense for the good of America. We need more humor, and while you have provided us with two humorous events, both were dripping with contempt, bigotry and hate. There needs to be less evil, more Johnny Knoxville.

OH! Lock yourself in a full porta potty and have folks roll you down a hill. I bet you could find a few volunteers in Louisiana, ready and willing to push. Heck, we’ll all pitch in for the one day rental cost for the porta potty. See? Liberals care.

© Erin Nanasi 2012

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Article from Think Progress










When I first started writing for the public, I wrote a few articles for a website called AddictingInfo.org. The owner of this site convinced me that his motives were noble-he wanted to draw attention to the lies of the right and create a forum where talented writers could share their articles and musings. Great, I thought, let's give it a try. My initial original pieces did fairly well, and as other writers joined, we continued to write original pieces aimed squarely at exposing the lies and bigotry of the right wing.

One morning, the owner posted an interesting "employment advertisement" on Facebook. He was looking for people who could cut and paste from other sites, dropping articles from places like Daily Kos, Huffington Post, Mother Jones and the like into his site. Huh, I thought, that's not exactly writing. But, I did it, with an article on HR 3. I cut and pasted an article from Think Progress, wrote a little blurb at the bottom along with "Article from Think Progress" and submitted it. Then I began work on The Bachmann Diaries.

At this point, I was also writing for New Progressive Muckraker, and having a blast. In fact, NPM is where I published the first Bachmann Diary, to the delight and hysterical laughter of my editor and friend, Cheri. It was during this time that the owner of AddictingInfo.org sent me a Facebook message, informing me that my article on HR 3 had gone through the roof, telling me about all the hits it was receiving and congratulating me. I responded, somewhat sarcastically, that I didn't write it, so I took this as a mixed compliment, ha ha. He went nuts, typing at me all in caps that I couldn't do that, he could get sued, that was plagiarism, you name it. I reminded him that I put "Article from Think Progress" at the bottom of the article, and never received another message from him.

My editor at NPM did receive a message from him, however, where he accused me of plagiarism. He went on to tell her that I rarely wrote my own articles, and that I stole from other people all the time, without attribution. He warned her against letting me write for her site, because of the dangers of legal action. She told him where he could stick it. And the war began.

I know this man has told many others the same thing he told my friend-that I was a horrible writer, as are many others who stood up to him, that I was a plagiarist, and that anyone who associates with me will inevitably be sued. Granted, I did have a website tell me they refused to publish the Bachmann Diaries because they were too scared, but I don't think being a wimp is the same thing as being sued for plagiarism.

This man runs a lot of pages and sites, and bullies those who dare to expose him for what he actually is. What we believe, and by we, I mean the editors who have served him with cease and desists for copyright infringement, the friends he has tried to have banned from Facebook and the people he has tried to hack, is that this man only cares about money. If writing about right wing politics in a positive light and attacking liberals were suddenly more profitable, he'd change sides in a nanosecond.

For the record, I have never stolen an article from someone else and posted it as my own. Hell, I credit Wikipedia when I use it, which isn't often. I post that I use an online dictionary site. I am very careful and always have been. You can't find the HR 3 article; he purged it along with every other article I wrote from his site. What's very odd about this man is that there is no information about him online. Let me restate that: there IS information about someone with his name, but it's not him. We believe he is using an alias that connects him to a prominent author and graduate of one of the finest colleges in America.

Do I know why this man attacked me without provocation and continues to attack other writers? Nope. Do I have any idea who he actually is? Not a clue. Am I sad that I no longer work for him? From the moment he sent that hysterical Facebook message, I have thanked God that I am no longer affiliated with him in any way. When he lied about me, I was even more happy with my decision. Yes, it was my decision. Whatever you may have heard, I chose to stop writing for his site.

I used to be afraid to tell the truth about what happened to me at AddictingInfo.org. The owner employs some fairly devious methods to "get back at" people who tell the truth about him and his website and Facebook pages. But now that I am a free agent, I don't have to be afraid. If he wants to come after me, again, like he goes after other writers and artists who have the balls to stand up to him, fine. We have the truth on our side.